Hopes and Dreams: Archive

2010

2010 has been the most difficult year of my life thus far. It was a year of great loss, pain, grieving, and torment. Although I may not feel like there is much to give thanks for, I will still give my thanks for… - Health (whatever health I have…) - Money to spend on things I enjoy - Clothes, food, and transportation. - My laptop and phone that keep connected to the world around...

Dec 7th

5:07

Woke up at 5:07 this morning with an immense heartache. Seems like the blades are cutting deeper today… sigh. it is what it is I guess.

Nov 30th

Faith

Just one of those days when I’m feeling particularly down and particularly faithless. This verse popped into my mind: 2 Timothy 2:11-13 If we died with him, we will also live with him;if we endure, we will also reign with him. If we disown him, he will also disown us; if we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot disown himself God…I feel pretty faithless and...

Nov 30th

How much longer?

I just showered and my hair is falling out by the handfuls… I feel like I’m swallowing glass shards everyday God…help me please my heart hurts so much.

Nov 28th

Kiss

Lord, work in me so that I may be able to continually kiss the hand that afflicts me. Lord, teach me to be satisfied in you, to trust you completely and wait on you. May you let the springs of life fill me deepest desires and may your grace and mercy cover my greatest hurts and fears.

Nov 28th

Springs

The biggest reason why my relationship wasnt succesful was because Jesus was not my spring of living water. Constantly craving worth, acceptance and affection, i turned to her at every moment and it took it’s toll. I’m sorry for taking part in ruining something that couldve been great :’(

Nov 26th

ho tohng ah…:(

Nov 24th

God, show me your will for my life

http://media.northpointministries.org/northpointministries/podcasts/npcc/Sunday_Sermons/gameplan/Part6.mp3

Nov 23rd

Thank you for giving me life today God.

Nov 22nd

The Trial of Faith

We have the idea that God rewards us for our faith, and it may be so in the initial stages. But we do not earn anything through faith— faith brings us into the right relationship with God and gives Him His opportunity to work. Yet God frequently has to knock the bottom out of your experience as His saint to get you in direct contact with Himself. God wants you to understand that it is a life of...

Oct 31st

sigh…why’s that lady gotta be chewing Extra watermelon flavored gum…:’(

Oct 30th

Your Rod and Your Staff

Hebrews 12:7,10-11 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those...

Oct 29th

Scared

God I’m scared…Hold me close.

Oct 28th

Truth

http://ridgechurch.sitewizard.biz/customers/107061313513139/filemanager/01_All_Is_Not_What_It_Seems_1.mp3 Help me not to be afraid of the truth. Show me whats true God.

Oct 28th

Revelation of 10/25

‎Be patient with God. Not everything happens immediately. Don’t be so eager to get out of seasons that He’s placed in your life. Learn to grow in joy and love for God in all circumstances and be willing to accept His will, whether you think it’s good or not. So God, I say I surrender to your will. Remind me to not live my life for myself. If it pleases You for me to be with...

Oct 25th

Father, In my brokenness, may I worship you and may my praises be a joyous sound to your ears. Love you, Alex

Oct 25th

10/24 6:46am

Good morning God…:’( I’m sorry… http://ridgechurch.sitewizard.biz/customers/107061313513139/filemanager/WhiteFlag_Part2_SD.mp3 I wave my white flag God…

Oct 24th

Lord…:’( Lord…:’( sigh…help God help…

Oct 24th

Hallelujah, hallelujah Whatever’s in front of me Help me to sing hallelujah Hallelujah, hallelujah Whatever’s in front of me I’ll choose to sing hallelujah

Oct 23rd

Today's Daily Bread

http://odb.org/2010/10/23/first-impressions/ God…I’m not sure if this applies to me. Would you continue to speak your truths and let me gain a deeper wisdom and love today. Love, Alex

Oct 23rd

I need your compassion and grace Lord…:’(

Oct 23rd

bleh

feel like gagging again…sigh. it’s like I’m pregnant.

Oct 23rd

10/22

Doing a lot better now. Thanks God :)

Oct 22nd

blah@

sigh…I keep gagging :( almost threw up in my hand just right now. gross. Lord let me learn my lesson quick and let this cup PASS!! (and perhaps let me be with her in the future too :P) love, Alex

Oct 22nd

Honest Feelings

Before when I was in a relationship before, I questioned whether we were right. It was tough to determine that while we still had feelings for each other. I always prayed that God would show us whether we were or weren’t. I didn’t know what I was looking for…what sign. How can we be open to God’s will when we were so in love? So I set friendship boundaries in hopes to...

Oct 22nd

10/21 3:34am

God, How can psalm 37:4 apply for two christian’s if one’s heart desires another and another’s heart desires someone else… Bless her God and give her wisdom and discernment to do the right things. In my current circumstances, I trust you and all I have is yours. love you god, Alex

Oct 21st

10/20

Just received another rejection from Georgetown. On top of everything currently felt, things just keep piling on. God…remind me of my worth. It’s very difficult when all I hold dear is lost because of me. All I can do is trust in your word that somehow this all is good for me.

Oct 20th

I miss you :(

Sep 10th

sigh…and the loneliness sets in :( Back to just me and you, God

Sep 9th

Season of Trust

God, Help me learn to trust you in all aspects of my life. Lord, would you consider my fears and help me know you hear them. Increase my faith for my fears are overbearing… Love you

Jul 21st

Jul 20th

“The best way to find out if you can trust someone is to trust them.”

– Ernest Hemingway

Jul 19th

6,913 notes

Andy Stanely - The Story of Your Life →

Jul 19th

“The end result [of transformation] is that we are greatful for everything in our...”

Jul 18th

Andy Stanley - Your Move Pt 1 →

Jul 15th

God, I keep hearing this recurring theme of freedom, but I don’t know what it means. I don’t feel really free emotionally or spiritually. Help me find this freedom and peace in you.

Jul 12th

Jul 10th

Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. God, Tonight I watched as my hopes were thrown away. I lost what I thought was a future that would bring me happiness. I wept for you, yet I heard nothing. I sought out for the comfort of my friends, yet I was alone. My...

Jul 8th

Jun 19th

Birthday Wishes

God, For my birthday, I have three requests, but first let me give you thanks. I thank you for the love-filled three years that I got to spend with Kathy. I thank you for blessing our years together. I thank you for filling our hearts with so much joy when we were together. And Lord, I thank you for teaching me lessons in true love and forgiveness. For my requests, 1) Search my heart Lord....

Jun 15th

Words..

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ee925OTFBCA

Jun 11th

Healing

God… Healing is in your hands. Please heal Grandma An if you are willing :(

Jun 6th

:'(

Psalm 56:8 KJV You number my wanderings; Put my tears into Your bottle; Are they not in Your book? sigh…this is too hard God. :’( it’s too much.

Jun 4th

Torn

My heart is torn God. The burdens are unbearable now. You have said to come all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Where is my rest Father? You have placed me between two mountains of decisions, neither of which will bring me peace. I am not in green pastures, but rather beds of thorns. The waters beside me rage and roar. I pray, yet I hear nothing. I seek, yet I feel no...

Jun 3rd

May 20th

:’( I wish there was another way God…

May 19th

two years

May 17, 2012…sigh So I did hear you correctly, God…When I prayed and heard two years several months back, I guess it really was you. Father, I pray that you help us to grow and mature…I agree we are too immature right now. I’ll trust you’ll have whats best for the both of us. I’ll trust that you know my heart and that you will really “give me the...

May 18th

God, Hold me close cuz I’m not that strong…

May 15th

Wisdom

God, I want more wisdom. Lead me on paths of righteousness for Your Name’s sake

May 10th

Watch

This sermon spoke to my heart so deeply… “You got it…I trust you…” “We no longer need to controlled by our fear of losing” “God will not let His people put to shame for having hope in Him” Hebrews 13:5 - Never will I leave you; Never will I forsake you.

Apr 21st